rethinking language around #actorslife
We are, thankfully, in an age where language is being picked apart a bit more. In many circumstances people are recognizing the importance of rephrasing language to avoid negative connotations and promote inclusivity and empowerment. As actors, we are keenly attuned to the nuances of language and the impact it can have on perception, both within our craft and in our everyday lives.
In this post, I’m going to be sharing some examples of how I’ve changed my language around certain industry buzzwords and phrases throughout my own career and experience, and share why embracing more positive and empowering language can enhance actors’ mindset, motivation, and overall well-being.
“REJECTION”
I’m not saying there is not a time and a place to use this word, but generally “rejection” is used with the idea that an actors life is full of rejection. A strong argument can be made that that is the right way to phrase it. But when it comes to auditions in particular, I don’t think, if you’ve auditioned for a role and don’t get it, that you’ve been “rejected.”
Let’s imagine you’re on a dating app and match with someone. After a brief back and forth sort of discussing what you might offer the other, or what you’re looking for, you are invited on a date. The date goes well, and you’re interested. But they, despite also having a good time, explain that things won’t be going further for the two of you. That’s not a flat out rejection…they were interested in you! It’s more like… “thanks, but no thanks. Maybe next time.”
Now imagine that they never explained that to you, they actually ghosted you. And they did genuinely like you, it’s just that there were 99 other people they wanted to meet up with. That is more realistic of #actorslife I guess…and when that’s relatable - you can see how the sting of that matches the word “rejection”. But it also shows that it really, really isn’t about you. (Unless you’re a knob) Casting Directors are generally very good at their jobs. If they’re inviting you to audition it’s because they think you have something to offer and you’re there to prove them right. The reason it isn’t going any further right now could be anything from “you already look a bit like someone who is already in it” to “they wanted a name” (yes, both of these are based on true stories).
This industry is incredibly over saturated. If agents replied to every email they got asking for representation they probably wouldn’t have time to actually manage their clients. That’s not to say that there doesn’t need to be some changes about how things are done in this industry, but I am saying that “rejection” often comes with the connotation of a personal rebuff. And if you walk through this business viewing each “no thank you” as a personal rejection, you’re setting yourself up for a slippery slope to unfulfillment!
Click HERE to find my post about building confidence
“GIVING UP”
This is one we talk about a lot on the podcast.
Below I will list the episodes we have of The 98% that feature amazing guests talking about moving on from the industry. They have turned out to be some of my favourite chats, I can’t recommend them highly enough! Thank you to guests Mabel, Charlie, Crystal, Katie, and Em.
S1E16 - “Life is too short to spend it feelings awful”
S3E16 - “Change can be scary, but don’t be afraid to change”
S5E1 - From learning to earning, a story of mistreatment in the acting industry (Part 1)
S5E13 - “I love acting, but I hated being an actor”
This change of phrase from “giving up” to “moving on” has become so simple to me over the years. Mostly because, through the podcast, I’ve learned how no one really leaves the industry and stops pursuing acting work because they don’t want to act anymore. It’s because they don’t want to be a part of everything outside of the acting. The phrase "giving up" carries the connotation of quitting or abandoning goals. It implies that the person “giving up” has somehow failed, or lacks the perseverance to overcome challenges. If an actor who nails auditions, has a body of work, regularly contacts people within the industry for opportunities, and does every single thing you can think a dedicated professional actor would do…and still can’t find work or isn’t having the experience that rewards their hard work, that isn’t “giving up”. That’s doing everything you can do, not being able to reach the desired outcomes (due to things entirely out of your control), and valuing yourself enough to know that you deserve to live a life you enjoy that you feel gives back to you. So you decide to “move on” from these pursuits, knowing you did all you could.
However…many still feel extreme anxiety and negativity when considering moving on from the industry, and I think one of the reasons is because of phrases like…
“NEVER GIVE UP”
Or variations such as “IT WILL HAPPEN!” or “KEEP GOING”
People mean well with these. And I see it time and time again on twitter when an actor shares how they’re struggling. As time has gone on I can’t help but think of these ‘encouragements’ as toxic positivity.
The reason The 98% was started was because of the prevailing belief that success in the entertainment industry is synonymous with fame, fortune, and widespread recognition. But we know that actors who have that experience represent such a small minority of actors. But because we don’t really hear from anyone else, actors may feel pressure to achieve these external markers of success, and any deviation from this path may be perceived as failure. If an actor is expressing concern that their heart isn’t in it anymore, or the difficulties of being an actor are just too much to handle, being told to ‘not give up’ only adds more pressure.
I’ve laughed with my friends before saying how I feel that most of us actors have an inkling of delusion. You kind of have to, to get through the utterly shite aspects of being in this profession. We have to believe we’ll be the ones to ‘make it’ because otherwise, why would we be doing it?! But at some point, for many, reality hits. One realizes that the ideas they had about being an actor (as mentioned at the beginning of this point) don’t actually exist, or may not for most. When some people feel like they’re putting absolutely everything you have into this lifestyle for not much return, the pressure of not wanting to feel like they’ve ‘given up’ only makes that worse, and for many just delays the process of finding more meaningful work/lifestyles. If an actor is struggling, maybe consider, instead of “don’t give up, you never know what is around the corner!” trying “I’m sorry your hard work and talent hasn't been rewarded recently, I admire you for so many reasons and hope you figure out what is right for you on this path!”
It is true that we ‘never know what is around the corner’. Emma Stone said recently that, for her, it was about “not giving up”. But of course Emma Stone feels like that is apt to say; winner of 2 Academy Awards, 2 British Academy Film Awards, 2 Golden Globe Awards, 2 MTV Movie Awards, a People's Choice Award, three Screen Actors Guild Awards, and 3 Teen Choice Awards. For every 1 Emma Stone there are thousands of actors who will never get near to what Emma has done, and that’s not a negative thing! And if those of us want to continue on this #actorslife journey anyway, to see what pans out for our actor journeys, amazing. But those who are considering not continuing down this path, very often find a life on the other side with grass that is actually greener. But they’ll never get a chance to explore that if the feelings of guilt and failure get in the way.
“MAKING IT”
Success in the entertainment industry depends on a multitude of external factors beyond an actor's control. Despite their talent, dedication, and hard work, actors may still face setbacks due to these external factors, which can lead to feelings of frustration and disillusionment. The pressure to "make it" as an actor, and the fear of being someone who hasn’t, can have significant emotional and psychological effects. It’s important to recognize that success in acting is subjective and can take many forms beyond traditional measures of fame and fortune. I met an actor recently who has been working consistently in the North American TV scene for 25 years, but you’d never know her if she passed you on the street!
It's essential to shift the focus from external validation to internal fulfillment and redefining success on our own terms. Actors can reclaim their power and agency in navigating the challenges of the entertainment industry this way.
Need help getting there? I’d love to help you with this! Book a session with me anytime.
I used to think that “making it” meant critical acclaim, awards, consistent acting work and never working a day job again. Now, I simply just want to pay my bills doing acting work…acting work I enjoy, represents me well, and connects me with like minded and brilliant people.
It’s also important to note that the notion of when you’ve “made it” always changes. I have friends with illustrious careers that other actor pals would sell their right arm for, but these actors don’t feel they’ve “made it”. Because their new normal has allowed them to shift parameters and goal posts.
Instead of chasing a dream, let’s work with what we already have. As I say “it’s not about ‘finally making it’ it’s about making your corner of this industry an enjoyable, fulfilling and inspiring place to be.”
“STARVING ARTIST”
The term "starving artist" carries several negative connotations and implications that can be detrimental to the well-being and perception of creatives. The term perpetuates the stereotype that artists are destined to struggle financially and suffer for their craft. This stereotype not only undermines the value of artistic pursuits but also discourages individuals from pursuing creative careers due to fears of financial instability.
By equating success with financial prosperity, the term overlooks the diverse ways in which artists define and measure success. Creativity, passion, and artistic fulfillment are equally valid markers of success, yet the "starving artist" narrative prioritises material wealth above all else.
Let’s not be starving artists..even if we are just eating beans on toast for dinner every night. Let’s be thriving artists. Let’s strive to thrive! Whether external factors say we are doing so or not!
“ACTORS LIFE”
Sort of the one that started it all. “The real #actorslife” has been a tagline of The 98% since it’s conception.
As said in the very first episode “‘Actors Life isn’t an instagram filter and a chai tea latte in a coffee shop highlighting lines”…
Actors life is working three jobs just to make rent in London.
Actors life is fielding “have you tried Eastenders?” at family BBQ’s.
Actors life is learning lines on the bus home and begging a friend to read lines over zoom. And then your internet crashes.
Actors life is calling your parents and tearfully telling them “I got the part.”
Actors life is being told you don’t have the part anymore because the producer gets the final say and you remind him too much of his ex-wife.
Actors life is not being able to watch a TV show without thinking “I want to be in this.” And then having a family member say “you could be in this.”
Actors life is filing your tax return as a barista.
Actors life is “we’ve gone in another direction.”
Actors life is trying to make your castmates corpse.
Actors life is learning, on set for the BBC, what the term “10:1” means and then loudly asking what 10:2 means before instantly realizing, but by then it’s too late and half the crew and the cast around you are laughing.
(10:1 means going for a pee…)
Actors life is acting. And not acting. And having the best experiences of your entire life. And the worst. Actors life is resilience and dedication and despair and disillusion and fear and joy.
Actors life whatever it is for you. Because you’re an actor.
(Unless you’re not and then…hi! Nice to have you here!)
If we’re talking about all that, just as much as we hashtag photos outside trailers or of highlighted scripts, or accompanying a “pleased to announce tweet”, then we might stop poking fun at the term “#actorslife”…
I hope this has provided some insight for you to help re-phrase some language within your own career. I’d love to talk through any of this, and more, in a career consultancy session - use the contact form to enquire about session and let’s get chatting about how to make your #actorslife path the most fulfilling it can be!